THE BROWN FAMILY | BYRON BAY | YAN FAM WAY 2.0
Before travelling to Byron Bay, I was feeling like a girl lost. Unsure of the direction I wanted to go with my work, feeling like what I was producing was becoming repetitive and tired. I reflected on the past year since my last Yan workshop, and acknowledged my growth and the changes that I loved in my work and life. But something was still missing.
While I felt like the work I was producing was real and true to my vision, it lacked the soul and depth I so desperately wanted, but was failing to seek out and produce. Something was holding me back.
In the weeks leading up to the Byron retreat, I started treatment for acute anxiety disorder. I had been battling with anxiety since my early 20's, but despite all the pieces falling together so beautifully in my life, both personally and professionally, I wasn't coping with the overwhelm. It was beyond what I could manage on my own.
The decision to start treatment was like serendipity when it coincided with Yan's retreat to Byron Bay, and I could sense the beginnings of transformation from someplace way down deep inside that had been stifled so long by so much fear and worry.
I was battling with side effects of medication, I was digging deep into my work and my "why", reflecting on what family means to me, and what it all means when you fit the pieces together. It was raw, real and overwhelming. All 18 of us were battling, digging and sharing. It was so beautiful.
It's incredible what happens when you fall down, and 18 women slowly, carefully and thoughtfully help you stand back up. It's even more incredible when you play a part in doing the same for each of them.
This shoot with Ness and her family was the beginning of this transformative few days, and I believe marks the beginning of a new kind of tangled and honest in my work.
Digging deeper, looking harder and loving bigger.
Some would say I'm crazy to share this on my business's website, and to that I say PFFT. Because life's too short to try and pretend everything is perfect. Real, tangled, messy life is way better than perfect anyway.
That's where soul and depth lives and that's the place I want to create from.